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NWNE

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Merry Xmas

1 min read
Finally got my stockings out... Hope y'all have a good one, feel the love people!
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Goblins....

1 min read
That sodding O2 advert's got stuck in my brain and not just the whistling, but the lyrics too.
I hate my friend for showing me the actual writer singing his song about goblins... "And a green one, and a green one..." Augh!
Stuck in my braincase!
At least its goblins.
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Relationships

4 min read
I've learnt a lot about relationships over the past three or four years and especially with my most recent ex...

Like how living together these days is BAD. Bad bad bad. Way bad. -Eventually descending to the equivalent of a white, patriotic, bible belt american trapped in a room with... well anyone else...

To tell the truth, it's not so hard if you're capable of compromise, and able to stop doing the things you find irksomely agitating about each other. Like leaving the toilet seat up... letting the butter melt and lying about it, lying about how much milk you used... lying about substances in general is a bad idea really. "Yes dear of course you're injecting that bathwater because you like the sensation..."
Or even lying about grooming your pubes with his Braun electric toothbrush...

So yeah, I'm programming myself to not just drop love wherever I con myself into believing its deserved, it gets less tolerable as I get older. To put it bluntly, when it comes to "the others", I've never been selective. Its usually been the most attentive or affectionate, and those with any sense will know that this is not the platform upon which to base a life-partnership.
Hence, this utterly shallow basis has lead to the failure of every relationship due to my unwavering and yet horrendously deluded belief that "they will provide" (thanks for that mum).
Inevitably, my "love" would be replaced with resentment and self-loathing, and as the slow realisation that I based my entire focus in life on a lie crept up on me, I would cower before my own hubris and frustration, blaming everything else of course.

I only started to get anywhere when I decided to change my focus. Men - waste of time. Career - ever progressing... um... I hope...
Now I can afford to be more attractive. Not financially no, but the acquisition of self-respect and a certain amount of humility has lead to inner security, which as you all know, leads to a better presentation and easier access to... hotties.

And of course, knowing how much I've learnt in such a relatively short space of time, I'm even more keen on learning now. I'm prepared to take more chances, do more with my life, be a person and not just a name around town... ;-)

Also being wiser in the years to come. Possessing the knowledge of EXACTLY how many shots it takes to get their pants off, while still being able to "function"... and also EXACTLY how many fruit pastilles it DOES take to choke a kestrel (Frankie Boyle fans)...

And I'm glad I kept up the expansion of my mind. It prevents cranial stagnation. But sometimes it can take a massive kick up the backside to get anyone remotely interested in expansion. And I'd never recommend dating an addict by way of a learning curve (although desperately pursuing spontaneous nudity across a crowded beer garden will broaden some minds I'll tell you that much...)
Life itself is a huge learning curve and those who refuse to accept that, still have much to learn, have already given up on it. How can you be satisfied with what you think you know, when there's so many things we don't even know that we don't know yet? The universe is full to bursting with things we can go find out! The right to knowledge is anybody's. But for some reason the responsibility to chase it, to look it in the face, say "Whaddat?" and actually listen to the answer, has been replaced with blind acceptance of what your "bessie" says. Even if that "bessie" is imaginary... *cough*
The universe doesn't care about us. All those religious nuts asking me "Well how do you know the universe is the only thing out there?"...
'Cos we went up there and haven't found anything else yet. Dumbass.

And its been proved that the universe doesn't give a crap because we know some pretty apathetic stuff goes on out there. There's nothing, for example, more apathetic than a black hole...

...Which leads me back to my ex...
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Merry what?

1 min read
Xmas is coming down hard and fast. And when you're trying to support two people on half a person's wages, its just gloom for two months.
Can't do much on here either except sit and look at everyone else's lovely art, because I'm too broke to go out and do anything save work. Yik.
Keep having a dream about monster under a trapdoor that wants to come after me. Thankfully I wake up before he appears but still... eeeeesh...

SO. When you're tucking into your big dinner, or sitting round a table with a few choice loved ones, please remember to take some time to think about the friends who can't make it. The ones who are struggling, and who really miss life.
If xmas is also about charity, and charity begins at home, then put aside a friendly text, or a warm phone call to those who are cast out of the bright glow of xmas "cheer". Let them know it will be worth it if they just keep trying. Brighten up someone else's day and you'll be surprised at how good you'll feel yourself.
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*Doreen* Gray

1 min read
I got sent a lovely message to wake up to this morning. Apparently my hideously talented mate doliver (dloliver.deviantart.com/) stayed up late giving me a makeover. Ie; he turned me into a zombie.
Is it strange that I look at the image he ended up with and actually feel beautiful? I mean, its not porcelain cheeks and plump lips but its enchanting nonetheless. I'm pretty choked with it to be honest :-)
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Featured

Merry Xmas by NWNE, journal

Goblins.... by NWNE, journal

Relationships by NWNE, journal

Merry what? by NWNE, journal

*Doreen* Gray by NWNE, journal